Might it be that one of the defining marks of Heroic Virtue is that many people are ready to find fault with it? Here’s something that I saw someone inquire about recently:
I just found out about what a re-married catholic couple agreed to do so that they are allowed to be part of the church and receive holy communion. They agreed to maintain sexual abstinence during their marriage. That way they are not committing sin and can continue to participate in the holy communion.
The response? Well I’ll give you a hint. They were not praised for their commitment to both marriage, purity, and the Eucharist. No they were “sick”, “unhealthy”, ”deluded” and “misguided.” The Catholic Church was all kinds of legalistic. The Church’s ideas were antique. (Like the 10 Commandments? Those are pretty old too.) And didn’t that poor couple know that God Just wanted them to have good sex?
For the record the Catholic Church is all in favor of good sex provided the marriage is sacramental and it is open to life. However, the Catholic church believes that a sacramental bond once formed can be broken only by death. Therefore, the good sex must remain in that relationship. If you must separate for any reason other than death, you must give up the good sex if you wish to receive Holy Communion. A few people brought up St. Paul’s words that couples were not to abstain from sexual relations. Here’s that reference:
1 Corinthians 1:5-6 Do not deprive each other, except perhaps by mutual consent for a time, to be free for prayer, but then return to one another, so that Satan may not tempt you through your lack of self-control. This I say by way of concession, however, not as a command.
Now let’s examine that scripture. The very first point it that St. Paul explicitly states that it is not a command. This couple have mutually agreed to give up marital relations in order to be able to partake in Holy Communion….that’s a form of prayer in the Catholic mind. They have not given up marital relations forever. They have given them up until their previous Sacramental marriages are dissolved by death. As far as I can see they plan to return to each other, the timing for that is in the Lord’s hands. Even if it WAS a command by St. Paul (and it wasn’t) this couple has mutually consented to give up marital relations for a time for the purposes of prayer. The only scriptural quibble that I can possibly see is that they don’t know exactly how long it will be…something wrong with leaving that in the Lord’s hands?
You know, you’d expect that heroic virtue would make those who hate the church mad but why is it so often that the flack these people get (I do NOT possess heroic virtue and so I have learned this from observation not from experience) from their “brothers and sisters” in Christ!? St. Catherine of Siena, St. Bernadette, the Children of Fatima, St. Teresa of Avila, St. Joan of Arc were all in the cross hairs of fellow Christians of their day. I guess I shouldn’t find it amazing that to the world one of the greatest examples of selfless Christian giving is excoriated by many of her “brothers and sisters” and Christ. Not that she needs it but I found myself defending her yet again this last week from charges stem from her well-known (on anti-Mother Teresa sites anyway) quote:
What we are all trying to do by our work, by serving the people, is to come closer to God. If in coming face to face with God we accept Him in our lives, then we are converting. We become a better Hindu, a better Muslim, a better Catholic, a better whatever we are, and then by being better we come closer and closer to Him. If we accept Him fully in our lives, then that is conversion. What approach would I use? For me, naturally, it would be a Catholic one, for you it may be Hindu, for someone else, Buddhist, according to one’s conscience. What God is in your mind you must accept.
Here’s what I said in response…..”Mother Teresa’s love and compassion had them BEATING DOWN THE DOORS to become Christian and even to become Catholic and she NEVER refused a convert. In a country (and eventually countries) where too often Christian Charity came with so many strings that the general attitude of the poor was “You aren’t here to help us. All you want to do is baptize us.” her attitude stood in stark contrast. She contended that you should meet the needs of every human regardless of the religious choices that they have made. She could say those quotes you find so offensive because Christ living IN HER was such a powerful example that people ASKED her about her faith. And I must say that if we are not living a lifestyle so exemplary of Christ that we don’t have people beating down our doors to become Christian; then, it is WE who are wrong and not her. Mother Teresa had a unique apostolate (see Corinthians about the body being made up of many parts) her specific calling was to being a servant of the poor and by her example teach us to do the same. She wasn’t called to be a preacher or a teacher. And while there are quotes such as you have referenced in the context of what she wrote and more importantly in the context of HOW SHE LIVED, they tell us that to meet each person where they are and treat them with dignity and respect and to honor the choices they made (even if she disagreed with those choices) is one of the most Christ-like things we can do. If she meant by those quotes that people shouldn’t convert to Christianity; then why on EARTH are there so many former atheists, and former Muslims, and former Hindus, etc. in the convents and monasteries she founded? Add in all of the people who were inspired to become Christian all over the world by her example and I think that what we have here is a case of a LIFE and ACTION trumping a few quotes.
In my own life, I understand exactly what she means. I have seen too many times when a non-Christian is reluctant to become friends with me because they are afraid my friendship will be contingent on their conversion. It is only AFTER I have proved myself in the relationship (sometimes after many years) that they will allow my example to speak for itself and begin to ask the questions that lead them home.”
I think it is probably more important to see what a self-described non-religious person said in response to the exchange.
I hadn’t looked at these forums in a long while until the last two days when I’ve read through many posts. Now I have an explanation for the malaise and almost-anxiety I feel. Seriously. Given what some will post here, I’m left to wonder what some people say when they’re among “like-minded” people, cozily cloaked in their moral and religious superiority. And most importantly, if their children are listening.
I am irritated, saddened and disgusted that religion, even the same religion, engenders such divisiveness among people. For those posters who think they have a charge to bring others to Christ, take it from a “non-believer”, this ain’t the way…
Who would have thunk you could bash Mother Teresa under the guise of belief in Jesus Christ?
There’s nothing to learn here.
Here are the words of Our Lord:
And the king will say to them in reply, ‘Amen, I say to you, whatever you did for one of these least brothers of mine, you did for me. Matthew 25:40
Her words:
Jesus is the one we take care of, visit, clothe, feed, and comfort every time we do this to the poorest of the poor, to the sick, to the dying, to the lepers, and to the ones who suffer from AIDS.
She also said:
It is very compelling that before Jesus explained God’s words, before he explained the beatitudes to the crowd, He felt compassion for them and fed them. (Matthew 5) Only after they were fed did he start to teach them.
So what is it that crawls under our skin and makes us criticize those who serve Our Lord in a heroic way? Is it some form of covetousness taken to a new level? Do we somehow think that we’ll be more holy if we can just knock that holier someone else off their pedestal? We’ll yes on the surface she tried to live out the gospel message in a heroic way, but did you see what she said?
Perhaps we have something to learn from the official sent to close Mother Teresa’s Home for the Dying in Calcutta? After touring the facilities, he went out into the crowd rioting outside and said that he would close down her work when they sent their own mothers and sisters to do what Mother Teresa and her Missionaries of Charity were doing.
